It has been ages since I have wrote in one of these things, likely since I was back in middle school, but compared to some of the people I surround myself with that isn't such a long time. It occurred to me today that writing to one of these books like you are talking to someone is supposed to be therapeutic and relieve stress, so I plan on finding out. To get things started, maybe it would be best to relieve the biggest burdens on my mind. I am still grieving the loss of a long time love, and the mere thought of her face is enough to set me on rage enough that I can hardly contain the beast within. I am currently involved with a girl I care very much for, but she is maybe too young for me, and of another race all together. I have to worry about control around her to such a degree that if I even nearly scratch her I have to worry about turning her in to a Lycan. I worked hard to build the Body and Mind in to the success it is, and I recently got an invitation to open a branch in Virginia, and if it hit off well the partner would want to open a nationwide chain, but I have decided that I am going to blindly follow my gut and put faith in my Ulfric, Ash and follow him wherever he leads me. In fact, if I could be put to use enough with the pack to make it a full time job I would hire a general manager and leave the business to him or her. But the thing that bothers me most is my loss of control. It drives me batty that I can't control my body in every way anymore. Perhaps my faith in my Ulfric and my loyalty to the Lupa that guided me to him will lead me to my control again. I can only hope at this point. I think that's enough for today. Perhaps I will write more tomorrow. Who knew the masses would be correct. I feel better already.