I never thought that I would get a call like this from New Orleans, but I did. I haven't been there since Anton Capraru left me, abandoned by my sire, to go to Tennessee. Following the beat of his own drummer probably. The phone call consisted of an invitation to return to the "Big Easy" and open up another Seven Sins Parlor as a part of an expansion. Seems there was a need for it, and my friend heard about the popularity of the BDSM shop back in the Chelsea district of London.
It took some convincing, a raise of double what I was earning back in London for me to come to New Orleans. But I keep my friends close, my enemies even closer. I put my flat on the market, and gave the keys to the shop to my assistant, Curtis, who had done a fine job helping in the shop. Although I would still be CEO of the business, the work of managing the business would now be Curtis'. After the sale of the flat on Sloane Square, I took an 8 hour flight back to the states.
Nothing compared to the weather in New Orleans. It was a vast difference from the cool mist that engulfed London. It was steamy even in the dead of winter. But I was back, back to the place that haunted my dreams. Of Anton, my lover and sire. Fighting the feelings of abandonment was hard, but having had Caspian with me for the past year made the situation better. Oh how we went into it over returning to the states, but Caspian finally realized it was for the better. After all, it was his home town. It killed me to separate from the were tiger, but I was hoping that he would come home to New Orleans too, when he felt the need to.
Right now I'm staying at a B&B off in the Garden District. I have a shitload of phone calls to make. A pack to find. Friends to connect with, a shop to open. It will be a lot of work, but I am used to it. I was born to survive, raised with a fitness that would surpass any other, human or wolf. I'd better get started as soon as possible, but first I'm going to get a power nap in to make up for the jet lag from the flight.
The shit has truly hit the fan. Out on one of my sojourns to look into properties for my shop, I came across a little Bistro with an outside patio. You'll never guess who I found. The unmistakeable scent of Caspian, led me to the weretiger, where he was hanging out with a young wereleopard named Dr. Owen Connors. Everything was going well until something happened between the waiter and Owen, Caspian grew angry and I acted to calm him down. Things had settled, but..........
Caspian had asked about my business earlier in the conversation and I told him all about the expansion of Seven Sins BDSM Parlor, then he noticed that Owen and I had been discussing bungee jumping, and skydiving, topics even the tiger in him would not broach. Caspian said something to the effect, "Seems you're busy makin all kinds of friends." I explained I had been so busy that I hadn't been able to meet anyone, including any wolves. Then the bomb was dropped......
It seems Caspian had been out the night before, hell knows where because I didn't bother asking, and he met two Master Vampires. Because I know Caspian's backround history with the vampire that basically was his Master, I knew this news wasn't particularly good. Caspian acted like it was hardly nothing, but he said he had a debt to collect from these Master Vampires. What had he gone and gotten himself involved with? On a personal level, Caspian hadn't committed himself to our relationship, it seemed he was holding back for something better that hadn't revealed itself yet.
I was left dangling...the reality of it all came crashing down around me. I was hurt, felt used, and a lot of other things I could not voice. Rage. It seemed that even though I tried, I failed to show Caspian just how much I really loved him. It came like a crushing blow to my belly. Things were no better later that night when he came to visit me at the B&B, to basically clear the air. He asked me what the hell was going on, and I grew angry. Message after message gone unanswered, until Caspian actually showed up in New Orleans. In London, he always had a way of tracking me down with that sensitive nose of his. Yet he couldn't find me here and contact me first......
Instead, he ran into other wolves, and lycans, and the Master Vampires. Oh he tried to comfort me at the table, but it was too late. I know he's going to sell his soul to the devil. There's nothing I can do to stop him. I was defeated, and lost. That night my temper got the better of me out on the bayou and I wound up eviscerating a 5 foot alligator in a partial shift, before I finally shifted over to wolf form. It was the same night that I calmly told Caspian, to have a good life away from me. That I told him to leave my hotel room, because I couldn't stand to see his face any longer. He said a lot about being there for me if I needed him, for any reason, but my tired brain could no longer process it. He left, and all I could do was toss and turn, until sleep caught up to me.
We all long to belong We all need to be needed Loneliness is our disease Still we bite the hand that feeds Where did we go wrong Insecure and self-sufficient Building up walls instead of bridges
Let our lonely hearts collide We're made to live this life Together Together Reach across this great divide Cuz standing side by side is better Together
All the pride we defend Teaches us to pretend Like we can make it on our own But we were never made to walk alone
Let the lines between us disappear It starts now It starts here Yeah! Let our lonely hearts collide We're made to live this life Together
I was messing around with my new Motorola Cliq, since my old Blackberry was accidently knocked into the toilet one night in London. I came across a few old numbers that I had downloaded from my laptop, one of them was Charles Geller. My old pack mate, and good friend. On a whim, I decided to call the number to see if it was still up and it was, so I let it ring, and got the voice mail.
It was Geller's voice mail, and I had tracked my fellow wolf down. My day up to that point had been shitty, what with meeting Caspian at the Bistro and getting a rundown on what he was up against. So call me moody. I left a message for Geller, and after an hour or so, he responded. Hitting my own voice mail of course. Said he was only 10 minutes away from The Garden District Bed and Breakfast, and was on his way over.
The wolf in him couldn't help but notice that I sounded a bit off, but he said we'd go clubbing and drink up a little. I would have preferred to catch up a bit with him, but he doesn't know my status of being bisexual. I didn't want to start talking about Caspian and wind up blowing Geller's mind. He drove up in a boat of a Cadillac, and I thought immediately of the B-52's "Love Shack." He paid me a compliment, of saying that my outfit looked good, but I still felt like shit.
Driving off, he tried to make me feel better about the trip to Urban Decay, where we were meeting his friend to discuss pack stuff. Great to have a little clubbing with wolf politics. Little did I know what I was in for. The three story building had a downstairs that could have been set in Seven Sins BDSM Parlor. Then there was a regular club on the middle floor. I sensed the strong prescence of another lycan on the top floor, a female wolf by the name of Silent.
To make a long story short, it was a shitty way to get a Corona. Even though Geller asked me for my opinions on what they discussed, when I did voice my honest opinion on having a female Ulfric and this council bull shit they were whitewashing as "love our neighbor as we love ourselves," a nice way of saying we are pro-supernaturals. I balked at it, and got chewed out as a result by Geller who disagreed with me. Silent was just as incensed and sided with Geller. I was outranked, basically.
I wasn't throwing a tantrum, but I was trying to get them to see from my perspective, not everyone likes vampires around. I am one of those people, because all I have seen as a result, are destroyed, watered-down packs. Before they made their point heard, I had agreed to back Silent. But she confused me by asking that Geller be the face behind it all, the recruitment of other wolves and such. I thought Geller and I were there to back her, since she was the one wanting to lead.
So there was balking on my part, first from that, secondarily to their pro-vamp stance. As a result, I decided not to back either, and choose my path as a rogue, even though all wolves are rogue without an active pack. I was so disappointed that yet again, belonging to a thriving pack eluded me once again. I left Urban Decay later that night, after spending time with Silent and Geller with a bitter taste in my mouth, and no hope in sight. I sincerely hope that I in no way jeopardized my friendship with Geller. I love him like a brother, but we disagree on certain points. Definitely.
Butterflies inside you give me butterflies inside Butterflies inside you give me butterflies inside Butterflies inside you give me butterflies inside
All you gotta do is just walk away and pass me by Don't acknowledge my smile yea when i try to say hello to you And all you gotta do is not answer my calls when im tryna get through To keep me wondering why and all i can do is sigh i just wanna ohh ...
I just want to touch and kissand i wish that I could be with you tonight You give me butterflies inside inside and I....
All i gotta say is I must be dreaming Can't be real Your not here with me I can feel you near to me So I carress you let you taste us Just so blissful listen i would give anything make my dream come true baby you give me butterflies If you will take my hand baby I will show you guide you to the light babe If you will be my love baby i will love you Love you till the end of time ~Floetry~ ____________________________________________________________________
The following night I was sitting at a little cafe's bistro, when a familiar scent caught my nose. A woman in a sundress that floated in the air around legs that just went on and on. Blonde. There could only be one. Jenna. I dreamt of her in my spare time as a young wolf, even though she was a white tiger. Much bigger than my wolf, but I always seemed to come undone around the woman.
A lot had changed in the time of my youth. As of late, a lot of hurt and strain. She could read it on me despite my enthusiastic greeting, where I swept her up in muscled arms and spun her around like a little girl. I was so happy. But she looked within me, to the core of my being. Then asked me about my heart. How was my heart. I replied, "I have no heart. It was taken away when Anton abandoned me...and Caspian.." I let my voice trail off.
It was hard to speak of Caspian to Jenna. So I didn't and she knew why. She understood, beyond what words could even fathom. That is why she is one of my most valued friends. I cherish her, and the differences we share. Her clipped British accent, and my exotic Middle Eastern one. Her tiger and my wolf. Her penchant for cutting her food into perfect little morsels. My need to have my food a certain kosher way.
"As long as you hurt, you still have a heart." was the most reassuring thing Jenna had to say, as we shared a drink and a meal together. She never touched her salad, but Jenna had touched me, deeper than anyone was brave enough to reach into the depths of my psyche, and bring light to a very dark place. With her, there was hope in the chance that something new was around the corner. Waiting for just me.
-- Edited by NATHANIEL ROSHAN on Tuesday 8th of March 2011 05:24:02 PM
I met Cullen and Hades in the Bourbon Street Bar and Nightclub the other night, and found out I don't like Blues music. It sucked badly, and so did my evening. A couple of rats were at the bar, a blonde and one with scarlet colored hair, like a rooster's comb. That was the one that had squealed like a girl, and I made a joke about it, but it must've come across as some kind of insult, particularly because I used the word 'cunt.'
The blonde decided to take up for the other fellow, and my hackles raised. He called me Fido. Which I ignored, until he got off his stool to back his words up with action. We were ready to start shooting up the place, when Hadrien and Cullen tried to calm me down. It so happened that Caspian was at the bar, and he stepped in to defuse the situation. He stank of the grave, and I wanted nothing more than to leave, which I did. The rat cursed after me, but I wasn't listening to him at all. I just needed air.
I found myself outside the club, lighting up when Jenna followed me outside. My dear friend didn't say a word, but she knew I was upset. Smoking a Noblesse, I calmed down, the adrenaline rush from a near-brawl taking place fading fast with Jenna's calming prescence washing over me. I thanked her, once in Hebrew, and once in English. Then I told her I had enough for one night, that I was headed home, and to tell Cullen that the key was under the mat. My brother in fur could let himself in.
Then I left the club, cooling down somewhat as I walked down Bourbon Street. I thought of doing something impulsive, like get my palm read or my fortune told, but I didn't need a crystal ball to tell me that Caspian was playing with fire. Hopefully the were tiger wouldn't be burned by his actions. It still was a thorn in my side that here he was giving me advice about turning my Glock on club patrons, when he's on a live wire with the vampires he met that night.
DON'T BRING ME DOWN DON'T BRING ME DOWN DON'T BRING ME DOWN
I've never been one For playing games You can move your mouth forever But the words sound just the same Something like Bang bang you're dead Couldn't we just make love instead Say yes because it's what we do best And I've had such a hard day
Take me where their eyes can't find us Without you I may as well just...
How much - do I have to say What more - do you have to see What will it take to make you love me Well you're not the first You're not the last You're not even the one who loves me the best But all I think about is you
So take me where their eyes can't find us Without you I may as well just...
So take me where their eyes can't find us Without you I may as well just...
DON'T BRING ME DOWN DON'T BRING ME DOWN DON'T BRING ME DOWN
Please don't wander from my door
I've never been one For playing games You can move your mouth forever But the words sound just the same Bang Bang you're dead Shouldn't we just make love instead Say yes 'cause it's what we do best And I've had such a hard day
So don't bring me down Won't you give me a break Somebody give me a break now!
DON'T BRING ME DOWN DON'T BRING ME DOWN DON'T BRING ME DOWN
Sweet little boy with oh such a big mouth Harsh words can get you into hot water When people don't understand you baby I'm always here for you And I And I will never bring you down, down, down my baby
Trust me I want you to trust me Oh trust me 'Cause I won't bring you down (Don't bring me down) I won't bring you down Do you trust me Yeah ~George Michael~
I really think I am in a world of shit. Here I am totally anti-vampire, and I have a vampire lusting after me, waving the white flag of friendship. It wasn't planned and I don't have a clue as what to do about Ramsey. He's quite a charmer, and I do admit I had fallen for it at the masquerade when my powers of discernment were stripped from me. I had given Ramsey my business card, and didn't think I'd hear from the Scottish man again.
Boy was I wrong. He showed up like clockwork the next night at Seven Sins BDSM Parlor while I was doing inventory. The distinct aroma of undead and a chill racked my body as I stood there in shock from seeing Ramsey again, only as a vampire. What did he want from me? He found me interesting, what with my latex cop outfit, mask and bitch paddle at the masquerade. Too bad I didn't hang out with Jenna and her friends on the other side of the ballroom.
Otherwise I wouldn't be in this shit now. I had taken the stunning Jenna out for the night of her life, sharing our first dance together was a memory I shall store away as most pleasant. I was joking around with Owen, who was dressed up like a Baron or something of that sort at the bar. He bumped me while I was passing Jenna her drink, and I saw it as an opportunity to smack him on the ass with my bitch impression paddle. Ramsey was there, and suddenly interested in what was going on. Then we were in conversation with each other.
In a way, it was better not to know that the personable Scot was a vampire. Now that I do know, it makes me uncertain of what to do. It seems I unsettle the vampire in him for some reason. He turns to mush around me and starts to babble. An effect that is no surprise to me at all. Its happened to others who've engaged with me before. I hope to G-d he doesn't want anything more than to be a friend. I do have my own standards, and tend not to stray away from them. Unless someone causes me to do so.....
-- Edited by NATHANIEL ROSHAN on Tuesday 15th of March 2011 04:30:33 PM
I never once thought in my mind that I would be writing this dear journal. It seems that the situation with Ramsey has taken a sharp (pardon the pun) turn. Yesterday at the shop, I interviewed a human, Zack Sullivan, for a position at Seven Sins. He turned out to be everything I wanted in a sales person, so I hired him on. He didn't have anyplace to stay or anything permanent so I offered him the spare bedroom in the apartment that neither Cullen or I were using. He moved his stuff in, while I went out on an errand.
I was supposed to only be delivering a ream of flyers to be distributed at All That Jazz, that Ramsey wanted to hand out. I really appreciated his willingness to do that for my business here in New Orleans. But...it turned out to be something completely different than I expected, or ever saw coming. I know this. I am loyal and those of my pack (they know who they are) come first. The wolves will always come first as far as I am concerned. But in his office something happened between myself and the vampire.
We were talking one moment, and the next he had me pinned against the wall. For a moment, I hesitated. Then I placed my hands on his shoulders and kissed his lips. His tongue was like a heat seeking missle, his one hand knotting itself in my golden hair, the other traveling down the front of my jeans searching...searching. All I had to do was say yes. I did. Next thing you know, I was face down over the arm of the sofa, ass up in the air. My clothes like, vaporized to lay in a pile on the floor. He fucked me hard, then slow, then told me to beg for his bite. I've never begged for anything in my life, less not getting kicked out on my ass from my parents house for joining the IDF.
I woke up dazed and somewhat confused this morning, with a craving for Ramsey like never before. He has been in my thoughts all day. I will not mention how sodden my silk sheets were on my bed this morning. I was on the receiving end of the best fuck of my whole entire life. Caspian had been right, all along. I gave myself completely over to Ramsey, surrendering my body as well as my blood to him. For doing so, I received the most intense of climaxes my young body could withstand, until my legs lost feeling and I crumpled down upon the floor to my knees in the office. I babbled in tongues, not making any sense at all.
I remember he laid me down, with my body as a warm blanket. Comforting me like a mother would comfort a child. I started to come around, my brain connection with my mouth made me able to talk and make sense. He got up to get me a drink, leaving me to my own devices on the sofa that he fucked me over, and I got a really good look at his stiffening member. I just remember thinking, holy shit I'm thirsty. It was for more than just the water. I drank from Ramsey's cock, giving him the best head he probably had received in the past 320 something years. I don't even remember driving home last night. I just woke up in my bed, seeing images of our first night together. I was the moth to his flame, and he was so hot. I just hope that my wings don't get burned.
-- Edited by NATHANIEL ROSHAN on Friday 18th of March 2011 06:20:32 PM
Opening night at the BDSM Parlor went fantastic. Dignitaries, as well as close friends came, and some who must've gotten the flyer from Ramsey's club. I didn't see Caspian or the brother rats however, which was strange. I thought I told them about the Grand Opening of Seven Sins, but like most things I say, fall on deaf ears. For those that came, I provided the best there was, from the refreshments to my product line.
I can honestly say that I had a night full of enjoyment. I think I was most surprised by Jenna trying on a catsuit, that defined her rather dangerous curves to a T. Almost made me drop my champagne flute she was so stunning. A good thing did come from it all and that would be the business offer from Venus' fiance, Vincent. It seems my fellow wolf came up with a radio idea, and I could advertise Seven Sins on it.
We will set up a time to meet soon. Now back to the party! Venus has arrived and its no damn party without her!
~To be continued~
-- Edited by NATHANIEL ROSHAN on Friday 18th of March 2011 11:27:40 PM
